Metropolitan Room: Show #3 – 4/4/14

I have to thank everyone who came to this show in order to support me because they still made it even though it was raining out. People love to freak out when it’s raining and I think it’s a very strange thing to freak out about.

“Ugh. It’s raining out, better board up the house.”

That’s typically what I think people think when it’s raining out. It’s WATER! It dries! Unless you’re going to spend 16 hours in the freezing rain and then rushed to the hospital where they have to amputate your pinky toe – which, really? It’s only a nuisance at this point in human evolution – I think you’ll survive.

But still, thanks for getting slightly wet to come see me.

As I made my way to the venue with a few co-workers we were looking for a place to get something for dinner. We happened across a place called Hill Country Chicken, a restaurant with southern style food and one that kept honest with the New York City prices.

5 bucks for a thigh? I think Elliot Spitzer paid better prices for his mistresses.

ZING!

Anyway, I made the suggestion that we give this restaurant money in exchange for their delicious fare and people seemed hesitant to go. I, mostly because I don’t pick up on social cues, decided that this would be the place to eat and walked right in.

It was raining out and we needed shelter quick!

As I am waiting to pay for my food I hear behind me, “can I have the chicken and waffles without the chicken?”

Excuse me?

I would’ve been embarrassed enough if it was just a person standing behind me who ordered that, but it was a co-worker and good friend of mine who decided those words should be heard by other humans.

My face was red. It was an odd mix of my face being cold because of the rain and wind and some kind of embarrassment because someone had the audacity to not order chicken in a place that specializes in it.

“Dude, really?”

I had to reply in some way to make him know that I thought it was really weird that he decided to do it.

“PETA called and they said you don’t even have to apply for membership you’re an honorary member because of how you just ordered!”

Joke of the night by far.

After I was done laughing and getting the stare of death from said friend, another co-worker whispered in my ear, “it’s Friday and he’s, like, super Catholic.”

Suddenly things went quiet and I was horrified. I was horrified that would be friends with someone so…Catholic.

Anyway, we enjoy the meal while he choked down food that was so inferior that when the waiter brought it over he basically asked him to eat outside.

After we feasted it was off to the venue. When I entered I got to walk past the line of people waiting to get in and right downstairs to a bar like area that was so dark and damp I wished I was waiting outside in the rain.

At least the hospital was warm and had TV.

As myself and the other comics sat there awkwardly talking about our lives and asking personal questions none of us cared to know about each other, the show started.

Immediately we were told to watch out for a group of tables near the front of the stage as they “were not playing by the rules”.

That sentence is equally as confusing to type as it is to read, I’m sure of it.

Finally it was my time to go on stage and I had the opportunity to use my new, flashier moniker…

Robert F. Peterson

I added the F to be more distinguished and to steal Paul F. Tompkins’ thing.

My set went pretty well. I took some more risks than I normally wouldn’t and was very happy with the result. The tables that were “not playing by the rules” did kind of throw me off a little bit. It’s not easy to get the look of death from people – were they devout Catholics who heard how I made fun of my friend?

I had a great time either way and the crowd was awesome. The new material can use some polishing but I’m very happy with what I came up with. Next steps are writing more material for longer sets and eventually getting out to Long Island for a show. Also, going to places that specialize in meat during lent means really short lines.

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